Posts Tagged ‘Uncertain Future’

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Level Up

March 23, 2010

A few days ago, I started reading about poetry. I write poems, and I have written at least a little more than 200. But I did not really excel so much in being able to define everything technical about poetry. For me, poetry was a way of expressing the most raw emotions. It was a way of release, and outlet where I could say anything I want to say, where I could paint the pictures that I never could do so with visual arts.

However, I decided to really go out of my comfort zone and become more technical in writing. I cannot just write about MY feelings forever. I also have to write about so many things that exist on this earth. This drive is the one responsible for my goal in being more than just a writer. I want to really comprehend other writers too. Yes, poetry is open to its reader’s interpretation. But the appreciation of poetry can only be grasped by those who also write with discipline. Right now, I am just a little more than a tabula rasa. I still need to leran so many things, so I can call myself a pretty picture of colorful knowledge and expertise.

I know that I can writer. But I would feel so much better and more fulfilled if I also know the correct manner of writing. My father used to be my biggest critic. Now, I am doing his job for himself. I need to be more than I what I now. I need to improve. 🙂

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Wednesday Hustle

February 10, 2010

For today, I am going to give my poetry project a rest. I have to conserve my energy for tomorrow. Once again. tomorrow is Thursday Poets’ Rally. I still haven’t written a poem for tomorrow’s rally, though. I don’t want to post an old one. I want to write something new, and then post it for tomorrow’s rally.

I gave two of my poems to a friend, so he can create a tune for them. He told me this morning, he was already done. But he won’t present it to me until he brings a guitar. I’m pretty much excited to hear what he came up with. Hopefully, it will be something tasteful. 🙂

Also, Valentine’s Day is approaching. This is my second favorite holiday, with New Year as my number one. I’m planning to just have a quiet dinner at home with my mom. My boyfriend is probably going to join us for dinner if he likes the food. He always prefers eating at their house, except when I have something yummy at home. 🙂

I’m also hoping I’d get some good news before the day ends. I’m not sure if I still deserve it. I;ve been having a lot of good things lately. Another one may be too much to ask for, but I’m still hoping for it. My blogging friends, I’ll meet with you all tomorrow online. Let’s enjoy reading more poetry, discovering more talent, and meeting more friends. 😀

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So Much To Lose

January 10, 2010

Today’s blog needs a soundtrack. I couldn’t think of anything to write about, so I looked for a song to inspire me. Luckily, I found something. I’m not sure how many people knows him, but Erik Santos has this song entitled “My Love is Here”. Now, at least, I’m in the mood to write. Unfortunately, I still don’t know what exactly I should blog about.

Let me try this:

Sometimes, we lose love, and when we lose it, we are left too numb to even feel anything else. We stop feeling the pain; only the numbness remains. I should know because I have been through that before. Just because I found my sunshine now doesn’t mean I did not have to shed an ocean of tears in the past. I did. I had to.

Why are we so scared of love? We’re scared because we all know that nothing in the world is permanent. Love may always stay, but people don’t. At one point, we all lose the people we love. At one point, we all lose. Period. This is why most people are afraid to love. This is why most people think that love sucks. We are all scared. Some of us are just brave enough to face their fears, and I want to say that I am one of those brave people.

It is good to be scared. It only shows that we have something to lose. I have so much to lose. Because I love people with so much intensity, I know I am putting so much of myself on the line. I have so much to lose, and I have never been happier about it. I am at my most vulnerable, but I have never felt so alive. I know that life is not made up of sunshine alone, but I know that even when the rain seems so fierce, the sun always shines after it. I think that I can face any hurt now because I have gotten to know love like I have never known it before. For the first time, I understand love in all of its facets.

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Weekend in New England (reposted from my other blog)

December 14, 2009

Probably the saddest song I’ve ever heard is Barry Manilow’s “Weekend in New England”. I was listening to Pandora earlier when the song played. It’s not just the lyrics that make it sad. The melody of the song itself is already a tear-jerker. I don’t know exactly what it is that makes me sad too. I actually don’t identify with the song because the story does not apply to me at all. However, merely listening to it makes me want to stop and think only of sad thoughts .

The lyrics are not nearly as heartbroken as “Somewhere Down the Road”. This song holds so much uncertainty, but for the other song, goodye was really inevitable. Still, this song is really the saddest. There’s a line in the song that says, “last night I wave goodbye, now it seems years”. I think it just shows that whenever we are separated from the person we love, the time we spend being apart feels so long.

So many of us have been through this. Situations may be different, but we have all experienced the pain of being away from the ones we love. Yes, it feels like eternity. Sometimes, we fight with those we love, and we need some time apart. Sometimes, we need to be away from them for a bigger reason than a mere fight. Whatever the reason is, time always feels so slow. The waiting feels like eternity. Waiting seems to be the most painful part when you’re away.

Another line from the song that I like goes like this: “time in New England took me away to long, rocky beaches and you by the bay.” I also think this line is true, and this happens to almost all of us. When we try so much to be away from people, to think or move on, we get swept away by the new places that we go to. The new things and new faces we come across take our mind off the things that we are running away from. But after all the thrill, underneath all the chaos, we always go back to that one person who can comfort us and make us happy.

When we take a time off, we try so hard to forget. We try to forget the hurts, the people, the responsibilities. In doing so, we fail to notice that what always brings us back are the things that we run away from. When we lose ourselves too much in the effort of moving on, the things that keep us on the ground are always those things that we don’t expect to do so. Then, when we realize what we really need, we always come running back. Sometimes, we return to things that have already become unfamiliar, things that have slowly evolved into something else during our absence. Sometimes, we go back and find out that there’s already nothing there, that nothing’s waiting for us anymore.

This is what makes the song such a sad one. It’s the uncertainty of things. We can never tell what happens tomorrow, or even a couple of minutes from now. We can’t ever foretell what’s in store for us, and I believe that’s the scariest and saddest part of this life.

To balance it, the song is not totally just a waste of tears. If we understand the lyrics, we will find that even if the song cries out loud with sadness, it is also a hopeful song. The song is hopeful because even if the singer is not sure when he will be reunited with his love, he knows that they will still be together in the future, but he’s just not sure when that time is.

As for us real people, this is what makes us move one with our lives. It is the hope that someday, everything will happen in its own time. If we are far from the person we love right now, we all have this hope that someday soon, we will be with that person again. Yes, love leaves, and sometimes love stays out of our reach. But there is always one thing that makes us keep believeing in it. It is the hope that love will never be forever out of grasp, and this is why love songs are always a hit.

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