Posts Tagged ‘Relationships’
He and I are complete opposites of each other.
He likes to blend in; I like to stand out.
He likes to go unnoticed; I enjoy a dramatic entrance.
He prefers to fade in the background; I aim to get the spotlight.
He likes to shut up; I love to talk.
He likes to be right all the time; I enjoy giving corrections.
It is a messy thing, him and I. However, we do have our moments. Sometimes, there are good times; there are great times. So maybe things are a mess and things feel like a whirlwind, but it’s far more enjoyable ride. I like the arguments. I like the challenge. I like treading the difficult path…. because in the end, I’d know that whatever it is that I accomplish, I will be proud to say that I worked hard for it.
Because that’s what I am.
I am argumentative. I am obstinate. I annoy easily. I am proud. But above all that, I like working hard for something. I love putting in efforts. I love saying I deserved something because I gave it my best shot.
This post is a day late. My late stepmother’s birthday was yesterday. However, as always, I have been caught up in work and other personal stuff, so I wasn’t able to stop and write about something.
She was a fun person. She wasn’t the usual stepmother character that used to be portrayed in fiction where she had imaginary horns and always made things difficult. In fact, she was kind and nice to me. She did not treat me like a daughter, which was just as well because I honestly did not see her as a mother. I already had a mother, and I did not have the need for one more. She also did not try to be my best friend. When I lived with her and my dad, I was at a point in my life where all I wanted was to get away and go some place where nobody really knew where I came from, and I could pretend I had a pretty normal life.
I am thankful for the years I spent with her and my father. It was during those years that I realized exactly what I wanted to happen with my life. I realized I wanted to be on my own, how badly I wanted to be free. So when the first chance at freedom came to me, I grabbed it without any second thoughts.
I try not to regret anything that’s happened in my life, any decision that I’ve made. However, the only regret that I may have is that I never got to thank her personally. I wish I could have seen her before she passed away. I wish I was able to tell her that all is well. Wherever she is right now, I can only pray that she has found peace and happiness that may seem to have eluded her while she was alive.
There are people in your life you will remember for always. You may never see each other again, but you know that these people have greatly impacted the person you have become.
I have so many people to thank the Lord for. As hard as life has been, I think I’d gladly go through all of the hardships again, if it meant I’d still end up where I am now.
I will always be thankful for the friends I have made along the way. I will also remember those people who have become a huge part of my life, even if it was only for a moment.
To my friends, thank you. To my family, lots of love. To God, you have my life.
Let’s celebrate happiness!!!
I was with my mom when I watched this movie. I have to admit, I watched it because Anne Curtis is my mom’s favorite. She watches Showtime everyday (I swear). Watching this movie was not even a question.
I have read so many reviews and comments about No Other Woman. Most of them had biases (no matter how objective they say they are). Some of them just wanted to write or blog about it, not really caring if the content had anything GREAT for the readers. So what am I doing writing about the movie when almost everybody has already done that? Well, to be different, I want to write about the things I realized because of that movie.
First off, INFIDELITY is obviously the biggest issue in the story. There’s this hot married man who, since he got married to his beautiful wife, has not LOOKED AT any other woman anymore. He has be FAITHFUL to her despite his colorful past with women. Then, there’s this sweet, beautiful wife who hails from a nouveau riche family and has dedicated her life to taking care of her husband, supporting him, and making him happy. And, or course, there’s this hugely interesting, one-of-a-kind woman who is an heiress to a great fortune and looks at the world and relationships in a different way. Putting the three characters together would be explosive (which is exactly what the movie was both as a story and as a money making product).
With that said, CHEATING is not the only thing we can pick up from the story. Of course, you will need to dig deeper for you to appreciate what the entire movie meant to you. It takes patience, but with a couple of minutes of thinking through, you will actually find that the issue of be UNFAITHFUL was not really what struck you the most in the movie. For me, it that’s exactly what happened.
Most people would think that Kara (Anne’s character) was the one who started off the entire conflict by being the temptress that she was and by luring Ram (Derek Ramsay) into an illicit affair. That’s because all this time, Ram has been LOYAL to Charmaine (Cristine Reyes), and it was only when Kara came into the picture that he went astray. I LOOK AT IT DIFFERENTLY. Sometimes, when women are in a relationship, they fear that some vamp will come and steal their men. Because of he movie, I realized that being loyal is a constant work. You always need to work on it. Being FAITHFUL does not mean that you have never looked at anyone else other than your partner. Being LOYAL does not mean that you have stopped being attracted to other people. In fact, it is the complete opposite. FIDELITY means that you look at others, you SEE other people, you become ATTRACTED to them, you might even go further and FALL IN LOVE with someone else. The difference lies on what you do with those feelings. Being FAITHFUL means that you still have these stirrings for other people, but you know well enough how to say no, turn, and walk away. That’s what RAM should have done. He SHOULD HAVE been FAITHFUL at that moment when his entire being wanted to jump into KARA’s hell fire.
As for the wife’s part, I realized that when a man cheats, it is not always the man’s fault, or the mistress’, or even the wife’s. Sometimes, it is nobody’s fault at all. Sometimes, these ugly things happen, and we cannot really blame anybody for it. We cannot say that it was the man’s fault because he was weak when it came to temptation. We cannot say that it is the fault of the mistress because she wanted a portion of a land that was not hers to claim. We also cannot say it was the wife’s fault because she let herself go, lost her individuality, and just became plain and boring. Sometimes, things happen just because they did. No one wanted them to, but they did. All we can do is fight for what’s ours, fight for what’s right, and forgive every other person who got caught.
For the part of Kara, I can’t say I have any conclusions. I guess, I can say that mistresses or other women fall in love too. It is not always about SEX and the THRILL. Sometimes, it’s about FEELINGS. Maybe if RAM had not been too nice to her, she would not have fallen very deep in love. Sometimes, they, too, are victims.
Nobody really wins when INFIDELITY is added into the equation. We all lose something. We may move on, but we will never really get back whatever was lost. I can only hope that I will never have to be in the same situation as Charmaine, Ram, and Kara were. To everyone, LOVE is BEAUTIFUL and PAINFUL at the same time. It is not always CHEATING and THIRD PARTIES that destroy a relationship. Sometimes, WE do that job pretty well. However, that is not the point. The point is that when we love, we love without question without boundary, without inhibitions. Hearts, promises, and relationships may be broken, but the DESIRE to LOVE and BE LOVED is far greater than these three.
People who are married, are in a relationship or have been in previous romantic experiences know that fighting is inevitable. As much as we want to avoid getting into a fight with our partners, Fate seems to laugh at the effort and throws random fights along your way. It always starts with a petty disagreement that even sic-year old kids wouldn’t be caught fighting about. Then it morphs into a full blown declaration of war where two people emotionally or physically hurt each other. Sometimes even both. The culmination to these fights usually features someone walking out, some couples breaking up, and some wounds digging deep.
You can call me out of this world, but I think fighting is one of the ways you can prove to yourself how much you actually care about someone. If you cared enough to fight, to exert so much energy, and to lose your control, then perhaps, you cared about that person that much. Fighting isn’t about who wins. It’s about the person who cares more. Women fight with the men in their lives not because they want to be heard or that they want to be understood or that they want their man to give them what they want. Most of the time, a woman just wants to know if the man loves her enough to lose the argument just so he can win her back. I am not a man, so I wouldn’t really know what a man’s reason is for fighting with his woman.
A fight can cause unnecessary pain. What two people can achieve without hurting each other is definitely way better than what they can achieve when they are fighting. However, it does not always have to be bad. After a heated argument when someone usually walks out or (if you are lucky to have a partner who never walks out) sulks, both parties usually have time to look into themselves and analyze what went wrong. If you really love the person, you’ll see that a huge part of the fight was your own doing. You’d realize that, when the storm has cleared, you still care for that person as much as you can. Plus, after a great fight, there always is great sex. That’s probably the best thing I love about fights.
I recently just came out of a terrible fight. I would never say that I was wrong. I had a point. I had to stress that out. He had to understand that. But that did not matter anymore. The fight has ended. What’s important is that nothing changed between us even with all the fights we have had.
My relationship, our relationship, is a work in progress. Well, honestly, I think it will always be a work in progress. We will never be like any happy couple who think that they found heaven in each other. We are not like that. Every now and then we have these really huge fights, and sometimes, one of us lets go. However, the reason why we are still together is that whenever one person weakens, the other is always strong enough for both of us. We keep working at that. We keep working on our relationship. We both know that we will never have heaven with each other, but with each each, we have our lives.