They say that when we forgive, we set a prisoner free. That prisoner is ourselves. I agree. When there’s nothing to forgive anymore, when there’s no anger to hold on to, you’re free to move on. You’re free to feel other emotions. However, sometimes, some hurts just go way too deep that not even forgiveness can fathom. Sometimes, there are things done to us that ultimately change our lives. Lucky are those who find a better life for themselves after they have been through the deepest of hurts. For some, they are not so fortunate. Others get stuck at the twisted situation they get caught in. Other lose their lives because of the pain.
I am proud to say that I have come on top after being at the lowest of lows. My life may not have been perfect, but I would never have things any other way. I have had many people hurt me. I have forgiven most of them. Most. Not all. You may say that I am only stopping my self from being completely happy because I still hold grudges. You’re wrong. I never said I still hold grudges. I am no longer angry. But I will never be able to forgive. I do not think of these people anymore. In fact, I can honestly say that I wish them a good life, great health, and peaceful minds. But I would never want to have them in my life anymore. Not at all.
I have still set myself free because amidst all of these, I have forgiven MYSELF. Not them but myself. I have forgiven myself for my lack of independence when I was younger. I have forgiven myself for allowing them to hurt me. I have forgiven myself for letting them get the better of myself. Forgiving them is another story. One that is not mine to tell. Their forgiveness is not longer in my hands. What I can do with my life now is to live a happy and content life. I can only hope that they will not feel the hurt an disappointment that they have made me feel many, many years ago.
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