Book Review: Desire Has No Mercy

Desire Has No Mercy by Violet Winspear

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

This book has an outdated theme. Seriously, most women these days no longer have to worry about carrying a man’s child, or of what a man thinks of her when she has gambling debts.

However, I am giving this book three starts because it was written in a way where you can understand where the heroine is coming from. The hero was also portrayed successfully as a complicated man who has learned his life lessons and was dealt a hard hand when he was young.

I don’t always agree with their arguments, but I get what the author wants to relay. The small tokens of wisdom as well from a secondary character is nice and subtle but is not lost in the love story.

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Bratinella

I have to admit it.

I am a brat.

When I want something, I want it right away. If I don’t get what I want, a storm breaks.

Last night, my latest “want” was pizza. I did not eat dinner on a birthday celebration we were invited to because I only had one thing in mind: pizza. If it wasn’t pizza, I wasn’t going to eat it.

I’ve craved for pizza since Saturday. The thought of eating freshly made Calda’s pizza was just too enticing. Yesterday, when we passed by Calda’s branch somewhere North, I vowed I was going to eat pizza before the day ended.

I know there were so many ways I could order pizza. However, I wanted J to order it for me. I did not want to order pizza myself. I did not want to mother to do it as well. I wanted J to do it.

I was so heartbroken when he came home without having called for a pizza order, without even plans of getting me what I want. I really don’t know what was wrong, but I just could not get a grip of my emotions then.

I felt so let down. It was so petty, but at that time, it was such a big deal for me. I couldn’t even stop myself. I just cried and cried. I felt betrayed and disappointed. I was so excited to eat pizza, and when I realized I wasn’t going to get any, I just felt so sad.

I really didn’t know what happened, you know. I just could not stop crying anymore. Eventually, J gave up trying to sleep and left. I didn’t know if he walked out on me or if he was coming back. I couldn’t even care anymore. I was just too heartbroken over a freaking pizza, or the lack of it.

After almost an hour, J finally came back with two boxes of pizza. Not really the one I wanted, but good enough and still delicious enough for me. When I saw what he had with him, I just felt elated. From being so down, as in rock bottom down, I just felt like I was in cloud nine and the crying fit I had did not even happen.

If you ever read this, J, I just want you to know that I am really, really, lucky to have you. I am sorry for being a brat most of the time, but you have to know, no one in this world could ever care for you as much as I do. I am difficult. I am mean. When I’m mad I say hurtful things. But I never, not even for a fraction of a second, stop loving you. At all. I also want to thank you for being everything that I could ever hope for, more than what I ever deserve.

Streaks

Love is not perfect.

People say that love is perfect and that the lovers are the ones who are not.

However, love, in itself, is not perfect either. I believe the only perfect thing ever is the creator.

Anyway, it does not really matter if love is perfect or not. After all, the most beautiful things in this life are those that have their imperfections. I mean, what kind of boring shit this life would be if everything was just peachy?

A rose would not be as precious without its thorns.

The rainbow would not come out without a first having a little rain.

A diamond would not glitter if it is not cut and bruised.

I guess what I’, trying to say is that while love is not perfect, we have a perfect God who loves us BECAUSE of our imperfections. That alone is one of the greatest things to be thankful for.

Burning Weekends

I know I’ve said I don’t believe in resolutions and don’t make any, so I am not calling this a resolution. This next thing I’m blogging about is more like something I’d want to try this year.

For 2013, I will try to do my best to make sure that my weekends remain “Weekends” and not extensions of “weekdays” and unfinished work that I leave off to finish during my free hours.

Last year, I sacrificed a lot of weekends by spending too much time working.

I mean, working for a couple of hours on a Saturday or a Sunday is fine. You know, as one of the leaders, I have to be available MOST of the time, to make sure my team is working as expected, to be ready for unexpected issues, and to clean up anything that needs to be cleaned up. This means that popping in, checking a few emails and making a couple of touch-bases and updates every once in a while over the weekend is perfectly normal. However, waking up in the morning and staying online and working all day or staying up until 4am on a Sunday night is definitely a big no-no. Not unless I actually own the company, which I’m pretty sure even the company CEO enjoys a great weekend. Being a workaholic on Saturday or Sunday will be crossed off my list of to-do things. Definitely crossed off. With a marker. In bold letters and bright red X mark.

Ironically, I am, as of this moment, still awake because I am at work. I am laughing at myself now, to write about keeping off of work but actually be working while writing. Anyway, I have to log off and say goodbye to the cyber world. It is time to work on this goal.

Hopefully, the Lord helps me work on this goal. Hello, great 2013 weekends. Let’s have some good times together.

Pyramid

The third day of January has been a rainy one.

For someone who does not like rain, or even just listening to the sound of it, this day is not a perfect one. However, I slept really well today, so I don’t think I have a right to complain.

I just don’t like it when it rains. I don’t know what it is about the rain that gets me every time. I always get restless when rains starts to pitter-patter on the rooftop. It makes me feel like the world is about to end. I guess I’ve always pictured the end of the world to be stormy, dark, and loud, with people, cars and animals screaming out loud.

Hey! It’s too early in the year to be this negative, you know.

Today is also the birthday of my aunt. I don’t know how old she is today. However, as I’ve always believed in, age does not come in years. Instead, it comes from life experiences, laughter, and tears. You are only as old as how you feel. I’m 28 years old, and I’ll be 29 this year. However, I’ll always be 26, trapped somewhere between accepting maturity and staying young to enjoy stupid mistakes.

I Will Stay The Same, But The World May Not

Hello, 2013. I am so ready for you.

Hello, Hello

Today is the first day of the year.

I wasn’t really looking forward to saying goodbye to 2012. For one, it has been an amazing year for me. It may be one of the best years I’ve had in my 28 years of colorful existence.

I don’t know what 2013 has in store. I don’t know if it’s going to be a good year, or if this will be a let down. I do hope that, even if it won’t be as great as 2012, it will still be a year that celebrates what life and the world should be about.

I have many things planned for 2013, big ones, actually.

I’m not a person who believes in new year’s resolutions. I’m more of the goal-setting type. This is why I don’t resolve to be anything or do anything this year. What I have is a set of goals that I pray I would meet before the year ends.

As a look back, I made a couple of goals last year that I was not able to meet. However, the more important ones I set were achieved, thanks to God.

For this year, I am going to set new goals and plans, higher and bigger ones. I hope and pray God guides me in making the right decisions, so I can meet the things I plan to meet.

I don’t really know what to ask for from God this year. I haven’t asked him for something big, lately, and I plan to keep it that way. All I really want for myself is to be healthy. All I pray for is that God will keep me away from any sickness. I will not ask for money, a great career, a happy life, a nice house, a car, etc.

All I need is health. As long as I’m healthy, I know that God will help me in reaching for greater things. Money and career is something that I have to work on, not something I ask from God. If he makes me healthy, I can work, have a career and make money. A happy life really depends on how I see things, also not something I also not something to ask from God.

So, Lord, please grant my only prayer of being healthy all the time. Please keep me away from sickness, of any form. Please help me keep away from the massive headaches that have been attacking me all the time. Please hold me in your arms, so that no harm will come my way. That’s the only thing I want for myself. For my family and loved ones, all I ask is to give them the things that make them happy, even if those things are at my expense.

Hello, 2013. For now, i really have no idea just what you’re up to. However, if you’re up to some mischief, let me in on it, and let’s be mischievous together.